From Author’s life: Sweet nothings

There is this guy, not guy, this man at my work who I somewhat fancy. It’s unbelievable how sometimes our system catches these waves and a transmission begins. I haven’t seen him up until few days back, perhaps he is from the other half, moved to our building after the merger.

Not a great looker but a strange sense of goodness surrounds him. We haven’t spoken so far, I don’t even know his name, yet I know his voice and I know his smell. The first time I noticed him was when we happened to take the elevator together. As the elevator’s door opened on our floor he waited for me to step out first, he followed me out of the elevator but reached the office door before and held it open for me. I smiled and said ‘thank you’ and we walked away on different sides of the corridor.

Years of work experience, been in and out of elevators with hundreds of co-workers but never did I see such gestures from another man. Speakes volumes about him. Since that day we smile and nod at each other in the cafetaria or the lift lobby or the library. The coincidence of taking the elevator together again didn’t occur, yet.

I do a bit more than just smiling and nodding and something inside me tells me he knows that and he follows suite. I look up every time he passes by my desk, every time he speaks loudly on phone I look up and check him out, he does that too. In the morning when I reach my desk I look out for him and if our eyes meet we smile.

Do I have a crush on him? I don’t think so. Crush means a lot more, I am happy doing this much. I don’t wanna know him, be friends with him or anything. In all probability he is a happily married man with kids and all but that is not even my concern, I just like thinking that he is a nice guy and if we were friends he would have been nice to me. It could be an illusion and I wanna keep it that way. It’s just that there is something nice in it, its a nice nothing.